Bloodb*llocks

In something of a rather unusual move, we bring to you something from the console world onto these digital blogrolls of toilet paper as part of your five a day. Only this time, this is more a diary of pain, misery and rage not involving talking to the HMRC about your last year’s tax return. Ladies and Gentleman, for your consideration today, please read on about Bloodborne, out now only on the PlayStation 4.

You died.

Those two words are now burned into my retinas. I’ve seen those two f*cking words so often, that I wish I had really died at times. That weeks from now, when the neighbours complain about the smell and the fire brigade are called to bust down the front door and find my blooded corpse, the words You died will still be on the screen and then people will know the truth. Continue reading

Rapidos Y Furisosos 7

WARNING: This post contains gushings about Jason Statham because he’s in this film. And he’s awesome. So there.

In the second film to come onto Ooh Sometimes which involves lots of hot car action in recent days, this one was one that had a lot more invested to bringing to the big screen, given what happened during the production to one of it’s major stars.

Since it’s release, it went onto to make a ridiculous amount of money at the box office, which considering how long this has been going on for and what it’s actually all about, is just insane. Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time we find out all about Rapidos Y Furisosos 7, with spoilers about the previous 6 instalments but then again, this is a series and you do need to watch the previous lot for it to make sense anyway.

So now, after 6 previous films which started to tie into each other a lot more, what would the 7th bring us in terms of story to justify some way over the top car scenes where the laws of physics go out the window and probably there will be another 700 mile long runway for the bad guys to land on like in Fast and Furious 6? Continue reading

The Return of the Road Warrior

Mad Max: Fury Road, finally made its debut this week and remarkably it’s got very favourable reviews which is surprising in itself considering that a lot of the time, you only really see people bounce up and down for anything Marvel does or if it’s got a shot of Harrison Ford with a zimmerframe next to Chewbacca who hasn’t aged a day.

The last time we saw the Road Warrior was when he was played by that lovely rascal Mel Gibson back between 1979 and 1985, so basically it’s been around 20 years since Max, who clearly is still a tad silly wandered onto the big screen, and of course time has moved on, along with the audience.

So with that in mind, what would this film bring for not only those who love the existing franchise, but those who haven’t got a clue about what Mel was doing back in the desert all that time ago?

In fact perhaps we need to shed some light on what the hell this is all about first and set the scene for what is to come. Well in the starting few minutes of the film, we learn that in the distant future (maybe next Tuesday, who really knows), the world became a desert wasteland and civilisation has collapsed. So basically it’s like Grimsby. Continue reading

WolfenCarCrashen

Full disclosure about the video: This video features the music of Wild Billy Childish And The Blackhands for the “Who Do You Think You Are Kidding Mr Hitler?” title music, which can be found here on Youtube and bought from various online stores like Amazon. We didn’t seek permission to use the music for this from the band, it was just used as part of the theme with Wolfenstein as part of the general p*ss take and as such we will never monetise the video at all now or in the future.

So after many tears cried over not being able to capture gameplay footage without it looking like a stop motion animation from the 1890s, cups of tea, followed by blood, guts and more tears, we finally present to you, the discerning public, the gameplay video type thing of Wolfenstein: The Old Blood!

A week after it’s release on most platforms, the game of course promised more fun killing naughty Nazis. And yes, there will be some comments made during the video of said game which will no doubt spark the previously mentioned international-incident-waiting-to-happen as people on YouTube view the car crashen.

The stage is set, the terrible history lesson is complete, the band prepared, shall we dance*?

YouTube Channel Link

* Terms and conditions apply, see pack for details, ability to dance dependant on mood and center of gravity.

The Aftermath….

In a result no polls saw coming nor indeed, it appears most of the politicians themselves who had been campaigning over the past few weeks, we now have a UK government lead by the new supreme overlord elect, David Cameron, no longer being the Captain of the Coalition, but instead the leader of an overall Conservative government. Whom it appears no-one has been able to use any other word other than “smug” to describe as he went through the doors of Number 10 with his wife.

So what happened to the rest of them then since it emerged as to whom who was nicking the keys to that modest little house next to Big Ben? How did this happen? And also what’s going to be next for us here in the UK?
Continue reading

There be Dragons!

Ladies and Gentleman, after the feeling of meh that a lot of people will be feeling after the UK General Election where not a lot of people will be feeling too happy at what’s happened, people lost their jobs, almost every political leader has now resigned after being a bit rubbish, leaving our lovable former “Captain of the Coalition” David Cameron to be reborn as Uber Roboto Cameronruuu!!!! Complete with laser eyes and fire breath, he will soon be again terrorising Tokyo once he has a nap.

So what better way to deal with all this than with drinking and more card playing / losing nonsense, recorded before the result was even known!

Sadly you will have to wait a little while longer to see what fun can be had with Wolfenstein: The Old Blood, released this week on most platforms which promised more fun killing naughty Nazis, but hopefully this will tide you over till that international-incident-waiting-to-happen hits the YouTube airwaves.

This edition is based around the new cards gained when we beat the Hearthstone Adventure Blockrock Mountain, there are some very interesting possibilities to be had, but what if you were to base decks around those new dragons and other weird cards such as that Grim Patron which spawns more of them if it survives damage and dragons which spawn other minions or copies…..and they say this game is all down to skill……

So once again I invite you to join me for another delightful time playing of hearthstone with beer* and merriment via the YouTube video below;

YouTube Channel Link

* Terms and conditions apply, see pack for details, beer pretty seems to be the right thing to have considering everything else….

Storage Overwhelming

It’s with a rather confused feeling that I began writing this post.

In fact, leading up till Wednesday, it had actually been quite a long time since I was able to sit down proper at my desk and actually write anything more substantial than what to get from the local supermarket and signing my life away to yet more companies whom I’m firmly believing they now own my soul as well as everything else I possibly have.

In fact there are many topics of interest to be had in the world, ranging from the terrible tragedy in Nepal, which is still struggling to deal with the terrible aftermath, to how many more comic book films we can stomach before we all die of boredom.

But rather than remark on all that, I found myself at my desk shopping around the various online retailers for brand new 4TB drives to add to the Evilbeast, as I had actually ran out of space on the 2TB and 1 TB drives and was about to blow even more money on storage.

How to give Netflix a run for their money….

Just think about that for a moment. These two drives which hold a tremendous amount of data, were full. Surely there is only so much porn you can download from the internet and only so much pirated material you can steal to rival Netflix before you just can’t do any more?

Well, it seems that in fact where the storage was being used more and more, was for legitimate games and applications. In fact it shows where the future is going in terms of what a typical PC gamer and possibly console gamer will need to do in future.

Continue reading

The General Meh-lection

Well Thursday the 7th of May, is the day we get to decide who will be best to run the UK before Scotland says up yours anyway and builds a massive wall around itself. Well the actual reality is you vote for a local Member of Parliament who in theory will care about the stuff where you are.

Whether or not they then just go to Westminster to have a nap in an office and earn a nice slice of cash on rent for their 12th home is then just par for the course for the next 5 years. But based on that choice, a Government then gets formed with a leader and various other people. But of course, back in 2010, it became another story of back-room deals and then everyone feeling upset.

This general election’s campaign by all parties, which has seen far more parties engaged in the process, probably more so as a result of what happened all those years ago, and perhaps with events that have transpired since then, well has been nothing but carefully scripted bulls**t, everyone accusing everyone else of lying, a public who doesn’t trust anyone, and basically polls upon polls telling us that no-one knows what’s going to happen.

Continue reading

AWOL

Well good people of the town / city / barnyard, it’s been a little while since I’ve sat down at the keyboard to write anything more constructive than blurb for the next video game post with YouTube video, so here’s just a little post to update you all on where I’ve been hiding and what I hopefully will be able to provide over the coming weeks;

The month of May due to various adventures ended being predominantly a myriad of YouTube videos, mainly about that digital crack cocaine, Hearthstone, with a couple of others mixed in for good measure. Of course, one must be a social butterfly and not a hermit, growling at passersby from under a bridge, and thus time was spent away from the evil machines a lot more. Continue reading

Blackrock Car Crash: Part 4

Ladies and Gentleman, as it’s a slightly sunny bank holiday here in the UK and you’re all sat at home lamenting that latest purchase from Argos that you will never use but you bought anyway because it was on sale…..welcome back yet for more card playing nonsense!

For this sadly final edition of the adventure, it will be the fifth wing of Blackrock Mountain we face, with four more fearsome enemies and cards to gain, and tears to shed at each loss. The forth wing had an almost unstoppable foe…..again, seriously, it seems to be the never ending story that we take care of a couple of naughty scallywags and then we get stopped by some nasty little blighter for 6 dasy while we figure out what cards to chuck at them.

So what fresh hell and drawn out pain are we in for now? Dragon dude Lord Victor Nefarius will be making a return in an effort to ensure that the mountain stays his forever more, and possibly get some work done on those nasty dragon teeth of his. Seriously they are worse than mine. But will he succeed in stopping us achieving victory or will he make more bad jokes and melt away, oh what a world, what a world….

So for the final time, I invite you to join me for another delightful afternoon’s playing of the hearthstone adventure, with tea* and merriment via the YouTube video below;

YouTube Channel Link

* Terms and conditions apply, see pack for details, tea doesn’t last long these days, need big flask….