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2009 Review of the Year

The Lord of Leisure | January 24, 2010

Yes, instead of focusing on the now, which as I type consists of listening to ambulance sirens bellowing out their ever-increasing wails to non existent traffic outside, let’s have a post dedicated to that year which no-one remembers fondly: 2009, the a**hole of the noughties.

(Note: Must find out what this decade is going to be referenced as by those silly radio shows.) And now for a brief news rundown of the year, complete with sarcastic remarks;

2009, it began with a basic message of hope, that old Barracks Omaha was going to make the world a better place and basically he didn’t, though still winning the runner’s up prize, sorry scratch that, the Nobel Peace Prize as a consolation.

Joseph Fritzel earned a place on best house makeover of the year for converting a basement into a modern all downstairs prison, complete with imprisoned family member.

Britain’s MPs were caught out with one hand on the John Lewis catalogue with the other firmly on our wallets, at which point the story became something of an early Christmas present for all to focus on the robbing g*ts stealing cash while the Cashageddon or recession as others called it, continued unbated for the entire year. MPs try to forget about all this, in order to make fun of each other as election campaigning gets going towards the end of the year.

Meanwhile, banks returned to their old ways, further annoying the populace who bailed them out with cash. Protests began in earnest, mainly around the G20, which for all I knew at the time, was another group appearing on the X factor.

Iran got more jolly as a result of Twitter, and thus people living there had a new way of telling people that life sucks massive hairy balls there while protesting over everything at most times of the year. One wonders why they couldn’t use the same technology to bugger off from there then?

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