While it may not be a post containing such wonders as discussion on how to annoy a lady of the evening by refusing her advances, or those pictures used for blackmailing your boss, it does none the less bring up something which doesn’t actually get old for some reason, and yes I’m afraid it’s game related.

GTA 4 came out some time ago, much the amazement and torment of people across the globe, and with it came all sorts of bizzare and downright funny goodies, such as this fine piece of TV making, which more often than not gets missed inbetween all the car driving, shooting, swearing and other safe for kids entertainment we’ve all come to expect and love.

I present to you for your consideration; something from Rockstar which should somehow get a stint on real TV….

Considering what’s on TV these days, I’m amazed there was never a series…..

After getting up on this fine Saturday morning, had some breakfast and a poo (not at the same time), watching a bit of the news, you know how dull people’s lives really are for the most part, I sat down to play some games (yes, instead of going outside into the city streets, with every increasing numbers of ladies wearing less now that the summer is coming). Steam, Valve software’s all singing all dancing money making distribution machine decided I needed to know about this;

Can you feel the dried up old boob that is now the Call of Duty franchise being milked again? 5 maps, three new for 12 quid after the “speical” pre-order price comes to an end. The mind, as they say, is blown.

This is not the first example of people getting overcharged for over hyped rubbish of course, look at the Apple maxipad, where thousands of fan-boys (and ladies in need to keep their underpants clean) went mad for it, only to discover slight problems with it days later with the wireless connection. The world is coming up with more and more pointless ways you can waste your cash.

The sad thing is people will buy it anyway….Come on! What happened to us men, spending our ill-gotten gains after pressing buttons in an office, on prostitutes, yogurt and other naughty items? That reminds me….must dash.

Boo hoo, why have about 2000 people only got invites to a beta test of a computer game that lots of people seem to care about, and I’m not part of it, I went to all the shows, paid thousands of pounds travelling round the world to turn up in a hotel dressed as Frodo, only to then be laughed at because my ears weren’t real enough, oh the torment, the horror, this is not why millions dies in countless wars so we are denied to play against people who fry in sunlight, but can move and build huge armies using the power of their minds instead.

Christ. That was a long winded sentence.

The thing is, I actually never traveled anywhere looking like a reject from Lord of the Rings, nor paid lots of money like others in the world, yet somehow, I was one of the lucky first few who got to play the first round of the Starcraft 2 beta, and the overjoyed look on my gleeful face having got home after a long hard day of sleeping, you could have used as a Christmas card.

And what would a post like this be without some pictures just showing the fact that I have it and you don’t, like the snide little small minded ba****d I am:

Well aside from the fact that I’ve been able to log onto something that others haven’t been able to, mainly due to the fact that they care very little and have other things to do, what could I possibly tell you about this beta experience of the sequel to one of the very best real time strategy games ever created?

Well, for a start, not a lot. You see, you are effectively thrown in at the deep end of the multi-player only for this testing, with the single player content, the part where most people’s interests will lie firmly remaining out of sight for the time being. You have to create a primary and secondary name to be seen by people, link that to your battle.net thing and then you start pushing buttons to start losing.

I say losing, as that’s what you’re going to do for the first ten matches in either 1 vs 1 or 2 vs 2 because I felt all cocky having got the chance to play and I lost within 4 minutes of playing the first game, as my opponent at the time chose to “rush.”

When I say “rush”, I don’t mean “rush to the bus stop as it’s just pulled up”, or “rush your homework by colouring in different doodles and hope that gets you a pass for History.”

No, I mean “rush” as in build lots of one type of a unit, normally the first one you get to build that has a gun or something, then go to the other guy’s base and destroy everything before he’s had a chance to put down some lovely carpet and do up the kitchen in the command center.

Games like this are a regular occurance at the moment, with one time the excuse given to me when I asked why he just “rushed” was, “I chose a random race, you have to just win when you select random.” Well, the idea of playing against someone is to win, but surely that just means it’s down to whoever builds the one lot of units first and races to your exact location. Like the strategy there.

The other current method of play is racing up the various technology options and then building one huge armada of the big mother f**king ships and the simply fly in and destroy everything. In nearly 4 minutes.

If this type of thing happens 10 times in a row before you can then placed in the special needs league for each type of game, you can bet your bottom dollar, that people are simply going to leave the multi-player content like the first game, where basically the Koreans using every limb possible took over the universe, (well one of them died on the toilet after taking over the universe) and then taking to the warm comforting safety of the single player and then walk away after it’s all done.

The new units, I’ve not really had the time to get to grips with as you have to try them out when you’re playing against a real person, so nine times out of ten, you don’t know at the present moment, what unit is good for what situation, hopefully they all have guns and they hurt the other evil people more than they can hurt me. There is a mode where you can play against the computer, however this mode is so easy to win here, even I can win here. The only way to get better is to play against others.

And that’s only dependent on how long it is before you throw in the towel and go back to w*nking. At least you win in an empty way, every time.

Just a day after the post about how expensive Modern Warfare 2 was in a certain chain and how much profiteering was about to occur, it seems the UK supermarkets are coming to the rescue, with Sainsburys for a limited time selling the Xbox and PS3 versions for £26, which even with my bad maths skills works out a lot less than what Computer Exchange was selling it for as of yesterday.

At last, more reasonable pricing I think you’ll agree. Just a shame the PC version once again gets overlooked for such a decrease by the majority.

Also because we live in cash-strapping times with other, perhaps more important things to worry about, we may want to know about other cheap deals on offer that we may not otherwise hear about.

Enter: http://savygamer.co.uk/

This site is updated quite often with the latest deals by all retailers, be an actual store or online distribution via Steam or your other favourite services.

Now go my gaming minions, go and save a wee bit of cash on stuff you didn’t need in the first place!

And Finally: It’s time for a late edit!

Edit: On the way home this evening past the Call of Duty event at Leicester Square in which a few of the crowd were wondering when anyone famous was going to turn up, only for some some scrawny people with a woman sellotaped to their arm to get out of a 4×4. Then came the rude words….

It was at that time that upon hearing said kind of talk it’s just best to go seeing as the best woman I could get sellotaped to my arm had a puncture, I was curious to see if the price was lowered at Computer Exchange, given the news the supermarkets were selling at way under the RRP. Sure enough, already £10 off. Which means now they are only double the price. Progress indeed….

In the last few weeks there has been strive among the gaming community about the “so-close, you can smell the napalm” release of Call of Duty: Mighty Fart 2, mainly the PC people at large to be honest, after being told the beloved multi-player mode would not have dedicated servers, no modding of the game at all, 18 players maximum on a peer-to-peer basis with the only difference between the console versions and this would be you can use a keyboard and mouse to play, and can turn the resolution up a bit more.

Add the insult of being charged more for it anyway for very little extra and also even if you have the disks now, you still cannot activate on Steam yet till release day while the Xbox and PS3 people happily lark about online as I type this, even to the point where the Xbox 360 version was the first one to be pirated and out for all to test with, and to be honest, even the old saying “All publicity is good publicity” seems to be getting stretched a fair bit.

What’s more silly was this sight today as i walked back from the local supermarket, carrying 30 packets of super noodles and a dirty mag;

That’s right, already, even before the proper street date of Tuesday 10th, (12th for PC thanks to Timezone differences on Steam) there are second hand copies of the game to be had, at the bargain price from this particular chain of Computer Exchange for £75. That’s just the standard version as well kids, not the fancy ones with a baked bean tin or Night Vision goggles you’d struggle to get the NHS to help pay for (Even if they are prescription).

There you have it, it was pretty much more than enough proof that the cash cow has reached the slaughterhouse. I even balked at £34.99 for the PC versions pricing as being too much for really, not a lot we actually do have any knowledge about bar a couple of videos and here were the console versions for £40 more in a shop window.

That is the problem we as gamers now may have to face. The industry is now competing with the films, music and other activities on an even playing field, and is where the money is there to be made, as people have been going out less, staying at home and investing in home entertainment, rather than spending every weekend at the local Yates, standing in the “Dirty Old Man” corner with their tongues hanging out at the teenagers pretending to be women….oh dear, I’ve said too much.

Activision know this from their money spinning of the Guitar Hero and COD series before, and have gotten to the point where enough actually isn’t enough, They now require your first born child too.

They know people want their products, even if it’s the same thing over and over again. Now they are raising the prices, and now starting to hold back more so you will end up paying for more in the future. DLC is a great way to keep the cash flowing way after the initial release of a product on the market, and that is what all this stinks of. Hell I’d be amazed if the next Call of Duty in 2010 doesn’t come with a £120 plastic gun controller with £50 optional sight to stick on top and other things to be purchased for “the ultimate experience” such as handle-bar mustache.

There’s profiting as a business and then, there’s taking the piss.

My PC will not see COD: MW2 for some time until there is a sale on Steam, or something else which convinces me this actually is a must buy like Call of Duty 4 and World at War (which to be fair was getting a bit long in the tooth Single Player wise until you got to the Nazi Zombies). Sorry, but even I have limits as to how much to pay for things, and right now Left 4 Dead 2 offers more value, something which is important now when we are still struggling to keep our jobs and keep other things going instead as well as having to just stay in as a result of not having the cash to do otherwise.

On that note, I bid you all good day, and will keep the money for MW2 reserved for a few dances from eastern Europeans down at the local bar. See, already looking for value!

It’s been a long time since I wrote about anything topical or otherwise here at oohsometimes, but for once the journalistic hat gets put on.

The 31st of October not only brought all freaks of nature for all Hallow’s eve for gathering chocolate, drinking too much and dressing only slightly worse than they do normally, it was the time of year for another Eurogamer expo in London, where companies from around the globe showcase their upcoming wares for the months ahead.

On the back of the successful first year, they moved to a bigger venue, and allowed even more happy go lucky people to enjoy the wonders of events only really enjoyed by those willing to travel to PAX or Quakecon in the US.

Just like last year, the place was stuffed to the gills with XBOX 360s, Playstations, Wiis (which looks strange to write down as a plural) and even some PCs on the main floor, which was a change from last year in itself. The poor old PC has taken a real bashing of late in terms of gaming creditability and it was good to see some games being showcased on the platform even if there weren’t many.

There was a good showing from most companies, all competing for your hard earned pound, more than ever right now, even though we’re all told the recession is all but a faint memory. Ubisoft, Valve and EA had some strong titles on show, with some of the best being described below;

Left 4 Dead 2

We saw some screenshots of the Hard Raid campaign during a talk being given by Valve’s Chet Faliszek (yes, a real bloke who works for em! OOOOOOOOHH!!), one of the highlight’s of the Saturday afternoon to be sure.

It was pretty sweet as he was explaining why they did some of the things they did with the game, what decisions they made for the player experience while monitoring people’s play over at Valve using their own in-house system which records the players themselves as well as their actual gameplay. Sometimes it’s only events like this, where you get to hear from the developers first hand do you understand what they do.

During the Left 4 Dead 2 QA part of the discussion, I waded in asking about a little zombie factory where you can practice your skills in Versus in the game as you could Single Player the campaigns but not the zombies. Chet responded and this will be quoting from the Eurogamer site now, that “they thought about that and considered a practice area, and they’re looking at it”

After the presentation, Chet was around the Left 4 Dead play area where lots of podcasting people (ah, that takes me back to August last year…) were waiting to pounce on him, which was a shame as we had a chat about various things too;

Here’s the gist of it:

There is no Left for Dead 3 coming next year, the release for the sequel apparently just worked out it was a year after this time round. Hmm, wonder if something else will be out instead?

He really didn’t want to talk about the children of the Valve forums moaning about the PC demo being late by a day, which is more than fair enough from a PR point of view and besides what could you possibly say about the matter? People are people as they say.

I even suggested a mode where the survivors from both games go at each other along with the zombie horde as not all of time can escape to safety at the end.

Apparently that had been on the table in a mode called “Only room for one” where only one of you get to escape and it’s just a matter of time before you all turn on each other, but they didn’t want Human on Human killing in this. He did however say nothing is 100% off the table. (If said mode does turns up now, I’ll be smug for about 5 minutes….)

Valve is a really neat place to work at, it’s also the place he’s actually stayed at the longest in terms of employment so that must say something itself. I couldn’t get over the fact everyone was their own boss and got to contribute what they wanted. The fact it seems to work too, well, bugger me, maybe others should do the same eh?

Brink

Now, Brink was a game I had not heard of at all, until the expo, and to be honest I only went because of their previous record of various Quake and Wolfenstein games actually being fun to play. I lost track of how many hours I lost to Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory in clan play or just having a laugh at some eight year old’s expense.

So I wasn’t sure what to expect from the session to be honest. What I did see wasn’t that bad (which I know sounds worse than it should be, but bear with me on this) and you got a glimpse of something while familiar, was looking to be unique in certain ways.

Brink from what I saw from the presentation was a sci-fi world where two lots of people lived on a isloated island city thing and got jolly angry at each other. They shot at each other doing lots of moves that fat people can only dream of, and oh my god, there was something that wasn’t supposed to be there. Dun Dun DUHHHHHH!

OK so based on that, you’d think “All hands were lost at sea. Bring out the Kazoo of grief.” But unfortunately for the cynic in me, that is not the case. Granted it is a FPS in the true sense of the world, but like some other efforts it does provide more than the standard run, gun and cry affair that a lot of FPSes are now.

You can co-op with other players while earning experience points depending on an selectable objective you change at will during the game by using command posts dotted around, and even change class to achieve objectives as well.

A simple little addition, long missing is Leaning round corners to shoot. Thank god someone finally remembered to put that one cover feature back, long forgotten since people who had never touched a mouse and keyboard starting getting upset.

One thing which got a great big cheer was the fact that dedicated servers was in the package as standard, something PC gamers got annoyed about (I got annoyed about the price to be fair) with Modern Warfare 2.

Splash Damage CEO Paul Wedgwood said I suck for asking a difficult question. The question was; what was there to make this stand out from all the other FPSes out there who were doing the same thing. Bit of a bastard question sure, but let’s be fair it’s a good one. The game did look good to be fair but in a lot of ways it wasn’t different to anything before.

For more, visit: http://www.brinkthegame.com/

Splinter Cell: Conviction

A surprise was seeing the Splinter Cell: Conviction E3 demo in the afternoon and it was just a couple of Ubisoft guys who came along and showed it off, it seems a hell of a lot better than the original demo back at E3.

Basically all the stuff you saw in the E3 demo happened but they actually showed it wasn’t auto pilot at all, something which was a complaint after people saw the original demo before.

The demo included how you use the crowd as a way of hiding from the bad guys, with everyone running away from you, you run with the crowd, the bad guys go in the opposite direction to investigate, easy opening to sneak in.

They showed some different ways of working the same scenario as much as they could with the same level triggers in place for the purpose of the demo, and tried to put down fears that might have been in place before.

I know it’s pretty much been highlighted with the text so far but honestly, it was amazing the difference just someone else showing something like Splinter Cell could actually be, and now it appears the game really is really worth waiting till February next year.

Assasin’s Creed 2

Of course one of the big pullers at the expo was the fact that Assassin’s creed 2 was on the floor, and despite many people including myself was losing badly with the PS3 controls and also we were playing the Tokyo Game Show code, which had a nice bug where it looked like you started floating through the air at the point you’re meant to assassinate the villain type guy, then your arms would flap before you fell back to the ground, it was a good indication of how the final game will play out when it comes out later this month Xbox and PS3 (PC is next year…..grrr….).

Everyone pretty much knows now the story of Oxo or whatever his name is, and the fact that Assassin’s Creed 2 covers his life as well allowing you once more to view the world from Desmond, the guy from the first game who was forced to relive his ancestor’s life for some naughty people’s aims, so we won’t recover that particular ground, if you want to read the story aspect, Google is your friend.

The demo at the expo was centred around your character being told about a naughty fellow who may be connected to the happenings going on so far, and you set off across town via a variety of methods not too dissimilar to the first game, except you can swim, take a gondola and the auto-pilot has been taken away from the climbing up walls part too.

You were able to hire people to help you out, and the best part was to hire ladies of the evening to “distract” guards while you sneak your way past. Once there you got the set-up with the bad guys while you still move about, setting yourself up for the kill.

All being well, you get the guy and the whole world fades out while we see a very familiar scene from the first game where the dead guy still manages to read War and Peace out loud before snuffing it, and that was pretty much the demo.

It was sad that this would be the only way to actually trial the game without buying as there would be no demo to the general public, just as before but at least the expo provided an opportunity to play before you pay.

Other Games

Alien Vs. Predator was on show as a multi player affair on the PS3 (actually a lot of games were on the PS3, less than the Xbox come to think of it), while looking good, there was practically no difference to the modes of previous games, the alien still seems to be the easiest to kill, with the Predator being top dog, human close second. When will they learn to balance better?

I had the opportunity to play Uncharted 2: Something Something for the first time, having heard some good things about it, and to be play the PS3 exclusive was a hoot, with some terrific set-pieces and despite my ongoing problems with controllers instead of Mice and Keyboards, it wasn’t bad. Now if only I had £400 free….if only I had any money…..why am I poor?

The new Mario game for 4 players on the Wii; only one thing to say. It was f**king annoying!

Star Trek Online was shown on the PC platform and it was an offline affair, some predetermined missions which weren’t that varied so maybe it may not be fully representative of the final experience, but to be honest, I’ve actually now had my fill of the MOO games like World of Warcraft etc, therefore it wouldn’t be something to revisit until perhaps the next expansion.

Mass Effect 2 was on the floor, but god damn, you had to look hard to find in the basement, along with naughty fighting games, FIFA 2387255723 and some Hard Rain game that looked like it was one step away from being shown on ITV4.

And it was the same as what has been shown before, next to no content, the gameplay was almost exactly the same and if it wasn’t for the fact it said Mass Effect 2, you wouldn’t know the difference at all. Seems to be one to not get overly excited about, and perhaps was the reason why it was hidden away.

Beatles: Rock Band was set-up in the basement and all through the day you could destroy all the classics on stage;

Oh dear.

As for the expo itself, it was better than last year in some respects, the venue bigger, the snacks mildly cheaper, the location was a big plus as you could walk outside and take in the wonderful view of the riverside. Just the sheer number of games to try though was staggering, with even smaller dev teams showing off their wares in the indie section, where some unique ideas were to be seen, with the small hope that platforms like Steam, XBLA or the Playstation network will welcome and promote some of their efforts. You could have had a go at the PSPgo systems if you wanted, but let’s be fair; Why bother? Oh and pick up lots of free t-shirts as I managed to do so, just wandering around!

There was however one though really wrong which I hadn’t thought possible and despite it’s insignificance, it must be raised. I felt at times like a fish out of water. Seriously, in the land of social lepers, I was the one who made the elephant man look sexy.

It was mainly down to the smug Eurogamer volunteer staff (at least I hope they were volunteers) they had guarding various places who, for some reason, maybe they were never hugged enough as children, all had something crammed up their arrogant backsides, because if you even acknowledge their existence, you are made to feel like you fell out of a dog’s bottom.

But alas, as always in life you must forget about such “arse buckets” because in all honesty, if you actually want to trail anything, talk to the people in the industry, understand why and how things are done, it’s pretty obvious for the mere mortals of the gaming world, the Eurogamer Expo seems to be one of the premier events in the UK. Here’s to next year chaps!

Please leave a message after the beep….

Beep.

Ok, so it’s not a good explaination as to why I’ve yet again not been around this past week or so, I would love to fall back on the tried and tested work excuse which actually normally accounts for 99% of why I’m never around that much, however, Thursday Night, this is the reason why:

Yep, the return of Monkey Island to our computers and consoles after far too long was far too much to resist, and well it’s not a bad go at it to be fair.

The story is certainly an interesting one and there is more than enough to keep us guessing for the time being, which itself is going to be torture as there are 4 more parts to be released over the next few months. Arrrr ya saucy barnacles for making us wait!

Well campers, it’s been a strange week. A lot that was going on was all about work mainly which of course most people will suffer with that particular disease until we can all be like those people from WALL-E, or as we brits know them as: Americans.

But there were things worthy of note which also included waking up late each day to the sun beaming through the blinds like Scotty from Star Trek, and the weather has been lovely of late, but when all you are wanting to do is keep your eyes closed, anything which destroys that luxury will be viewed with the level of contempt only seen when a dog leaves a present on your foot.

There was also a Friday night out in Soho, but we’ll leave that confusing affair to a later paragraph which hopefully will allow me time to think of funny things to cast onto the white space. Otherwise, it’s back to the tried and tested sex jokes. So I’ll stick a picture about Soho, and carry on.

But to return back from the side step of the above writing, recently I haven’t been able to sleep properly. Perhaps it’s the guilty conscience of destroying another village in India, or maybe it’s just the sheer volume of traffic which passes my window at 6:20 in the morning. But now my nightly routines consist of playing WOW again, that soul destroying game where my communication turns into something you’d scrawl on a toilet wall using your own excrement.

In addition to that, it’s back to watching old shows and and then falling asleep to them, ready in time to wake up at 3am to switch off the TV. It’s become a kind of ritual this week, and I’m worried that this trend will eventually kill what’s left of my brain.

Saturday was a write-off again till about 4 in the afternoon due to the Friday Night that proceeded before and as I wrote in my cunningly leading third paragraph, it was jolly confusing why we wandered round Soho, not for the various naughty bars featuring women wearing clothes that refuse to stay on themselves.

It all started out pleasant enough, at a bar where we talked a little bit and headed on out to the evil place of naughty, where of all things, we ended just a very tiny bar where we had one drink, got bored and then we all split up for food. I guess the time I woke up has been all the proper sleep being missed catching up to me.

And then to turn the blog entry on it’s head once again about something so different, you wonder what was the point, Sunday evening brought about an interesting state of affairs in the world of Online Gaming. Or more accurately Left 4 Dead.

You see, Left 4 Dead has had some updates to it recently, one of which was a new Survival mode, in which you are certain to die, it’s just a question of how long it takes before you are overwhelmed for sheer numbers. Normal people call that the London Underground.

But it appears that most people on the Left 4 Dead servers are very upset if you’re not the world’s best at it. Today was the first time I had given the mode a go, along with a friend from Sunny Wales way, and we went onto a couple of maps, and at some point, a guy from one of those gaming clans out there, bugger knows there’s far too many to count, came on and started getting upset with the way I play.

Long story short, some written abuse back and he went. Some time later my friend was kicked off a public server by other people, who again seemed unhappy about dying early in a game mode designed to kill you. All in all, it seems that at the moment, there are quite a number of either kids or mentally starved for something more in life people who are playing at the moment, so perhaps it’s best left alone for the time being online unless all 4 slots for players are filled with people you know.

I guess that brings you all up to date. Time for traffic and weather, where you are.

While the times and cocaine habits have been eating into more worthwhile pursuits like washing up, perhaps it’s best if I actually give a humble written opinion on the gaming silly season’s worth of recent releases onto the gaming platforms of recent memory.

Granted, one could argue that there are greater topics of discussion to be had, such as the fact that Climate change has basically taken a back seat to everyone’s pockets being emptied more than usual, or that AC/DC have released an album for the first time in years.

But seeing as I know very little about all that, I may as well amaze you all with my lack of knowledge in another area. Don’t be sad, there are pretty pictures with all this at least. So let’s take a look at some of these choice pieces of meat and make rude comments about people’s hard work starting with;

Fallout 3

It’s America’s favourite Nuclear holocaust simulator. And I suppose to a great extent it went down very well in other countries as well. After all, what better way to spend a Sunday afternoon than blowing up Super Mutants using grenades and a handy aiming system which lets you view the resultant carnage in swirly telly vision?

(No, down the pub getting smashed doesn’t count in this case)

One wonders if Al Bundy or whatever the terrorists call themselves these days like playing this game as it’s as close as they going to get seeing the whole of Washington blown up in detail. After all, they get to set off a bomb of two in this and I guess they need to get in some practise somehow. Oh, look at me, saying this game is a training ground for Terrorists. Next thing you see is that they cry out against Microsoft Flight Simulator for teaching them how to fly aeroplanes….

Err….

Anyway, as much as it pains me to say this, I’m afraid I’ve played very little of this game so far, having turned my attention to the vast number of other titles which have been released around the same time instead. But so far, the impressions I have are mixed. On the one hand you have the VAT system which allows you to target your enemies to great effect and also sort out you tax returns while you’re at it.

And on the other, bugger me sideways and call me frank if you would have to spend over a week non-stop doing nothing but that game. It seems to go on and on like the Celine Dion record like Titanic. And frankly with my limited attention span, I’m not sure how long….ooh a butterfly….

Call of Duty: World at War for the f**king 84383rd time

Yes, those lovable Germans. Bless them for not getting a bit pissed at the various World War games created showing them being defeated time after time. I know the allies won 2-0 so far but sometimes you just wonder if enough is enough. Then my friend Liam reminds me that shooting Nazis is fun and well, would you believe it, off to war we go again, saving our many privates.

Call of Duty once again places you in various over the top battles with cinematic bits all designed to make you think WOW in various langauges. You have co-op modes and other multiplayer puzzles to solve in a battle which will cuminate somehow in a battle in Berlin, but no robot Hitler in this one. Shame really as I would like to see that again.

Thing is…why did we go back to World War 2 again? Call of Duty 4, which was reviewed here for Gamers’ Corner a fair while ago now, showed that the game had grown a fair amount, exchanging the past for the clear and present danger we face today and it had been done so well, it was hard to fault it at all.

Here, well, hmm. Don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing. Either way there has been some shooting shenanigans with the Japs who do naughty, and there was a barbeque afterwards, using a flamethrower, and the overall sense that I’ll probably move back to playing with my belly button sooner rather than later.

Wraith of the Lick King

The above screen is as far as I have got with the recently released expansion to the biggest cash cow in gaming history. With 11 million people already addicted, now seems the perfect time to release another injection of drugs into the system. And all I have done is created a Death Knight called SamFisher, and took the first quest.

After that, the masterpiece of modern cuisine known as Super Noodles were done in the kitchen, so off I went to eat them instead. Haven’t touched WOW since.

Left 4 Dead (Well the demo anyway)

Hmm, a co-op game with Zombies where you just go and kill as many as you can while being rushed by them. Simple enough as you might agree, and I believe this may be the new king of Multiplayer. My god it’s just over the top, hugely simple shooting fun with lots of gross bits designed to make your girlfriend leave the room while you carry on creating a death toll bigger than all Rambo films combined. Valve, give me this game now and I wouldn’t be upset…

And that’s you’re lot for now as later this week, even more games come out and it just gets silly. Credit Crunch indeed eh? And as it turns out, no wonder I write so very little at the moment…

Pray silent, for the tides of darkness draw near, and we see the evil of this world tremble in fear over the onslaught that awaits them.

Their foul stench curdles the milk, their battered shells tell of things you only see in your nightmares, and if you eat one of their heads, you’ll find one of those lovely plastic toy cars you used to only see from Kinder Surprise.

I speak of course….of the EGGMEN.

You may now commence screaming in terror.

Of course the terror part of it all actually means that you will be screaming why the bloody hell did they bother? But give us a chance, we’re more shaky than Michael J Fox right now, but if we last longer than 5 minutes I dare say, it will be a right old show.

You see, us euro people have been neglected for too long, there aren’t that many gaming podcasts which cater for the complete sad f**ks who have nothing better to do but play with ourselves rather than remark on more topical things such as the state of the ASDA down the street or why there is hair growing in the most oddest of places…

Enter our attempt at making a bad statement on the world. With fellow comrades, Phil and Duoue, nothing is beyond our grasp, save the art of conversation, making sense, or even staying on topic.

Come with us now on a jorney through cyberspace….www.eggmen.co.uk